Help! My son is 19 months old. Everything in my house is packed away at shoulderlevel because he leaves NOTHING alone! He pulls things off the diningroom table and empties shelves of books with a sweep . He ignores me when I call his name or say "no". When you ask him to give you something in his hand he throws it at you. How do I teach him the right and appropriate behaviour without smacking ? ( And when will I have my house back???)

I can also recommend you go to this page of our Parent24 expert Anne Cawood. She is an expert on discipline, and has written a wonderful book called Toddlers Need Boundaries. There are lots of questions other people have asked which have relevant answers for you.

Most of all, remember you are not alone. It's a tricky phase, we all suffer through it a bit. Now can anyone tell me how to get my teen to wash the dishes?

Take your son and live with him

I don't have kids, but I have life experience (even if only due to my age!) and I don't think it's possible to discipline a child you only see once a fortnight.
Clearly there are serious problems at home with his mom. The aggressive behaviour seems to indicate a lot of emotional hurt.
The best thing might be to see to it that a social worker intervenes.
In the mean time, give him as much love and stability in the short time he spends with you. Perhaps try distracting him at this stage in stead of punishing him. It might be dangerous and cause difficulty later, but even consider having him sleep with you when he visits.
Good luck.

i'm the father again with the 1,9year old boy,in addition to all i said,when i caught my wife sleeping around last year, she and her mom took photo's of the child when he fell once,and everytime i caught her she and her mom told me that i can go and devorce,but then they go to the police and tell them i abuse the child,so that prevented me from devorcing,because it would be her and her mom's word against mine,the child fell in january and june i received a devorce letter from her lawyer where she also claimed that i abused her and the children,so i got a lawyer as well and she told me to go to the police,luckily i made notes of every time they blackmailed me (was approximatly 6 times)also the house is in her name and also the car,both is in arears,the water and lights is in arears of 59,000,she also received a summons from the high court for the water and lights,all the bills are with the lawyers and it makes a pile of approxamitlyn 2cm high,bills she hided from me,making secret loans and not making a single payment at all,for years,the car is ten thousand in arears,the father of the other child pays 2000 in maintanance,she hasn't once paid the childs school fees,she uses that money for entertainment at work,luckily she is so greedy,she claimed in the devorce letter that each is resposible for their own debt,just so i can't claim half of the house and the car,problem is,will my son hold it against me if i take him away from his brother and mom??will the child welfare put her other child in an childrens home?that is what i'm afraid off,and also will i split the two brothers for life

Pull him over your lap and give him the hiding of his life... Kids lack respect because they view their parents as playmates..

Without having all the relevant facts before me, but from what you have written there is a very unhealthy home life developing here for your child and step child.
We would suggest that you visit a psychologist to assist you on how to talk to your child and how to interact with your child while he is with you. You may even get the therapist to assist you while your child is with you at your home. Also you need to remember you are the adult and you are the parent. You make the rules, you set the boundaries - children need, stability and boundries like we need our next breath of air to survive. You need to remove all stimulants like sweets and chips, TV PSP’s out of the home. Learn how to make good holism food for your child – try a book called Sustained energy for kids by Gabi Steenkamp , Tanzia Merlin & Jeske Wellmann, also get your child involved to help you make the food.
You may also want to enlist the services of a play therapist to help you with ideas of games you can play with your child. Get yourself a book or look on the internet for ideas of art that you can do with your child. The more senses that your child uses i.e. pottery the calmer your child will be. Use this time to make positive statements i.e. that is a fantastic choice you made of choosing blue to paint your pottery with.
I read that you are married so you can apply for a rule 43 to obtain court ordered contact while you are going through the divorce process. You need to ask for far more time with your son. We would suggest that you request that you request primary residency for your child.
Further we would VERY STRONGLY suggest that when you collect and drop off your child that this is videotaped by an independent person of good standing with in your community, a Rabi or senior police officer.
If there are false accusations being made against you – you need to seek legal advice fast and start laying criminal charges against your ex.
Some additional reading you may want to consider
How to talk to kids so kids will listen & listen so kids will talk by Adele Faber & Elaine Marzlish
Boundaries with kids by Dr Henry Cloud & Dr John Townsend
Boundaries by Dr Henry Cloud & Dr John Townsend

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hi evryone!i'm the father with the 1year 9 months son again,me and my wife are still devorcing,actually she's the one devorcing me,but after descovering she was paying little to much,she decided not be available to her own lawyer,her lawyer withdrew and that put's us in a spot where we can't continue the devorce,but in the meantime,the greedy woman she is,she doesn't want to give me her bank account number,at this moment i'm buying nappy's and milk and keeping the slips,but i feel that she's pulling a legal trick,whenever i ask for her account number she just ignores me,i mean have you ever heard of a greedy woman refusing money from the father of her child,i'm offering to help her pay but for some reason she's avoiding me getting her account number,please ladies,what legal trick is she pulling on me,if there is any lawyers here,what is she attempting to do??i kept all the sms's where i ask for her account number,what can i do??