Hi there, our twins (boy, girl) turned three in April this year, and we have a 8 year old daughter. I got to a stage a couple of months ago where I made a conscious decision to go to the twins room with them at seven o clock at night andstay in their room with them until they fell asleep. I told them that we were not leaving the room as it is sleeping time. It also helps to get them to look out the window so that they can see it is dark and that means it is night time and that means we sleep. That seemed to have worked and now they go to bed a lot easier . They know that when we say bed time it is bed time. Our routine seem to have developed into me sorting out the bathing and getting them dressed in payamas and getting them fed, with the help of ouma who lives with us (thank goodness for that!), and then they play a bit until about 07h15 and then my husband takes them to the room and stays with them for a bit. They now also sometimes ask for a story (story time, mom!) so sometimes a story is read and then we switch off the light, sometimes to their protestations, sometimes not. I make sure they know that if they have a problem in the night, they can come to us at any time, and this does happen from time to time but I usually get them back to their own beds. Our daughter is a night owl, so she will sometimes get up and come look for hugs and attention but the boy loves his sleep and falls asleep quickly. He also gets up first in the morning and keeps himself busy building puzzles or something until everyone else gets up. The nappy thing has also just sorted itself out in the last two weeks. They have been off nappies during the day for some months but about two weeks ago, they just demanded that the night nappy also be taken off! So I am taking them for a wee before they go to their room and we have had dry beds for more than a week now, which is just great. I have to say, we did not push the issue, it just happened naturally. Same thing with the bottles. Our daughter was especially fond of her bottle - to the extent that her front teeth had to be removed, they deteriorated so much due to her sleeping with the bottle in her mouth. At the moment we offer a bottle with either formula or rooibos tea when they arrive home in the afternoons from school and that is the first and last bottle of the day. They seem to have developed an understanding now that bottles and nappies are for babies, and they are not babies any more. Just a month or two ago this was not the case.
I have to say, how you deal with a baby and another child as well, I don't know. Do you have help? I find that once the twins are in bed at night, I have some time to spend with the 8 year old, but she has to be in bed by 8 or I just don't make it... Good luck, just hang in there it does get easier!