I have punished my 6-year-old with no TV for a week after an incident at school where he hit another child. But as a punishment it is more of a punishment for me as he is so bored and needs attention constantly. I am also not sure if he really understands the connection between the no TV and the fighting at school. I did tell him of course. Do other parents use this form of punishment? Does it work for you? I really am not interested in spanking him, I never have and I never will.

You actually gave one, no, two, reasons why I don't believe in this kind of punishment. There are many parents who use this form of punishment. It was used on me and my brothers when I turned 12 or 13, but, to tell you the truth , it always allowed us to get away with "cheating" out of the punishment behind our parent's backs. My father worked full time, and my mom at home, but they were too busy to constantly watch us. Of course it only became easier after my mom had to work full time in an office as well.

I grew up in an abusive family. My father would do more than just beat us. He would come home from work always in one of his mood swings. His excuse was either someone pissed him off at work or he was tired (the ramblings was the tell), but the worst was not the beatings. It was what was said during them, and how the beatings took place.

When one looks at all the kids today that do not get corporal punishment one can see that they are whiny, slightly obtuse, and many times abusive towards their parents (in extreme circumstances even physical).

Anyway, to get to the point, despite what these psychologists, who are part of a VERY young scientific community, say, it is not bad to hit your kids when they were naughty. Despite my father being abusive, I believe firmly that corporal punishment, done right, teaches better integrity, helps them remember what they did wrong (pain is a good stimulant of memory, just look it up a bit in the scientific journals), and builds character (psychologists whine that kids that are beaten when young are usually more aggressive, but considering the world we live in, and all the whining going on around us, I'd say that is a good thing).

A good spanking given with love, always helps too, but TV is bad, if that is the only entertainment for the kids.

LEGO's is great for kids, but start buidling with them to give them idees, or ask them to build Star Wars ships etc.
But it is the parents responsibilty to start the process, whether it is marbles, Lego, puzzles etc. Kids get bored due to their minds not being stimulated correctly. TV makes kids very lazy, but if TV is the only entertaimnet, get a Wii with Boomblox or Wii Fitt to get them at least moving.

Playing outside the house, if possible is still the best. Play in the mud, my kids love that. They need to think what to do, give them toys or other play tools to start the process. I do not know your budget, but a swing, a mud/sand hole, some ropes and tyres go along way.

Good luck

How much TV does your 6 year old watch that he's so bored and lost without it? Obviously he has never learned how to play or amuse himself - because he's been stuck in front of a TV all day? If you allow the TV to become his whole life then it's clearly cruel to deprive him of it. Even crueller to let him carry on that way.

Agree 100% with Gustav, a good smack does wonder's for children as long as you dont go over board.

I am not suprised that your 6 year old doesn't see the connection. You need to make the punishment more relevant to what he did wrong. Some thing like making him draw a sorry picture for the other child, or give up a sweetie and give it to the child he hurt. How much TV does he watch anyway? My 7 year old can watch one program on a week night and that is it. I find punishment for this age is more about getting to understand what is wrong as they don't really know why rules are there in the first place.

an arrangement of punishment for a mind that is 6yrs old does not make sense. Its like negotiating with somebody that does not care about the end result. All he is doing is waiting for the week to end and go back to his "normality", so in actual fact he did not learn anything from this other than time will allow him to get away with his wrong doing. A more fitting strategy would be to actually spend time with him in his boredom , take him to a bookshop and select a good read or other activity like a long walk , both of you will gain.
Hitting a six year old for something like waht he did in school , will only promote violence in the child...... rather show in in this case that violence is not the end solution , which is what he used ?

Hmmm a few remarks...

1) I think that children watch too much TV as it is. I teach Grade 3 and my children really struggle with imagination. If they are asked to write about their holidays (or to tell news regarding their weekends) they always tell about the TV they watched or the PC games they played...all weekend. I believe children need to learn to entertain themselves in ways other than passive entertainment and to become more active. It is healthier, and better for them in general.

2) As to punishment/consequences... I believe it is important to use Natural Consequences. By this I mean consequences which relate diretctly to the behaviour you wish to show them is unacceptable. Perhaps for hitting a child the consequence should be not having play dates for the weekend. Thus you will need to miss a play date or two and on your next play date show that you can treat your friends with kindness. Another example is when a child refused to clean up his room. He then had to clean it while his brother went for a ride on his bike with his dad. The next few times he was not interested in cleaning his room, his mom reminded him rather to do it then when he was not busy that later when he may miss out on something. Thereafter cleaning his room was not an issue.

Hope this helps!

If you child seeks constant attention you should be enrolling him in differant sports and activities have friends over once a while. Hitting a child is a sign he is not getting attention and too often parents use TV as an excuse to entertain their children. And there may be another reason why he hitting maybe something going on at school that you re not aware of. I have many times walked into a disrupptive class where Ive seen who the problem makers in class are who are the bullies and bad influences when I use to get told my child did something wrong at school I now ignore it at Ive seen who the problem children are and my child often said so and so hurt me pulled my hair then he has a right to fight back children also need to learn to stand their ground.