Me and my husband are in the process of being screened as adoptive parents.
We firmly believe that it takes an extremely good mother to give her child up for adoption. Clearly she shows an inner strength which very little of us have. It takes someone who really cares deeply about their child’s welfare to acknowledge that they cannot give the baby whatever is needed and provide that little treasure with the ground stones of growing up at a family that can do so.

We sincerely believe that parent ship is a privilege that GOD will never deny anyone especially when the intended parents have pure motives for the child in their care. Although HE does not allow all of us to have one of our own I believe that it is part of HIS bigger plan. God knew that there will be helpless children in need and therefore had to keep some of HIS special children (adoptive parents), who HE knew will be capable to excel in taking care of these little ones.

Although the stats are made clear to us and we understand the limitations of adopting a white baby (we are living in a small rural "boere" area and know a lady that adopted accross the colour line. Today she and her baby has an extremely difficult life due to people not wanting to accept them in the community. I am not only talking about whites but even other nations are critisizing her for her decision. Our intention is not to adopt a child to make life even more complicated but rather to adopt a little one to give him/her a wonderful life) especially when regarding the fact that I already do have two (nearly grown up 15 & 18) children from her previous marriage I believe that GOD will not take the chance away from my husband to have someone calling him daddy. He so dearly deserves to be called daddy. He will most definitely be the best daddy this world has ever seen. He is an extremely kind, generous, GOD Loving and dependable person who lived his life to serve GOD. Why would GOD not give him this? He will be any child's dream father. To make this worse we do not have thousands and thousands to spend on "buying" the favour of the birth mother. We do have a stable income and the ability to live comfortably but we do not have banks full of spare cash that waits to be used. I've read lot of messages from adoptive parents clearly stating that those with the most money get chosen first.

In actual fact I believe that we are very settled and I know from taking care of my sister's baby during a difficult time she experienced that I now am much more relaxed and self confident in looking after a baby. The fact that I also do know what it is to have a child of your own are in actual fact making me believe that the baby we adopt should grow up with the truth. I will ensure to keep the birth mom updated if this is what she wants and also give her details to her biological child on a suitable age in order to prevent the placing of newspaper/huisgenoot articles in order to find each other. We fully believe that the birth mother suffered enough by giving up her baby and we will definitely consider her wishes for the babies future (within the law off cause and not to the expense of the little one) In our house there will definitely be love and cherishing in more than triplicate as the older brother and sister are as excited as us and will definitely spoil their little brother or sister rotten

If GOD has a child booked for us no stats or human predictions will stop HIM from delivering that child to us. GOD surely knows that we will be wonderful parents who will be able to provide in all the needs of such little one in need.
With constant love and attention any child can have a perfectly healthy emotional and physical childhood.

In the end the main ingredients for any child to flourish are LOVE, discipline, Security and routine. We have been through the school of life. We are homely with no destructive habits and will be able to provide any child with all the above and a good measure of stability. We are secure in our knowledge of being able to bring up a little one to the satisfaction of any onlooker but most important to the approval of GOD.

It does however sometimes get to us to know that the waiting list for white babies is extremely long and that chances are very slim. We already have all baby equipment and clothing for up to 2 years and the cot in our room ready this is how big our faith is but in the end we are human and then we take a dip of worry and doubt. The next day we get up again and start all over. Believing and praying. This is a roller coaster ride but believe me the day we get that little baby all the hardship will be forgotten immediately and joy will overflow the rest of our life’s.

I would like to hear from:

Other adoptive parents - maybe this will give me a bit of hope to hear your stories

Mothers that gave up their babies or intends to do so - we've been told that most birth parents wants their child to be with a couple with no other children and that chances are that we will never be picked. In our case however our children is independent and soon to be out of the house going on with their own futures (don't worry we are still under 40. I also had my first child at young age) Your baby will therefore be even more treasured. We no longer go out to parties and will never leave the baby with baby sitters etc whilst younger couples are still very active with their own needs. I guess what I actually want to hear from you is if you would have considered us as potential parents for your child?

my friend has been looking for her 3 children for the past 17yrs.i found them,and contacted them to find out if they would consider contact with their birth mother,reply was a yes.my friend contacted the post adopitve team,and told them she wanted to send them a letter,and that she had found them,etc.she was then told a while after she could write the letter,and she could put what ever she wanted in it,as they are all over 21!!.she wrote the letter sent it through the post adoptive centre,then decided to chase it up,as she had no reply from the kids,she was told by a different person,the letter hadnt been sent,as it was to emotional.lovely but to emotinal.it wasnt !! because i sat with her to write it,and was very careful what was written.so they said they will send her a letter writting pac,to give her some advice on what kind of thing should and should not be put in the letter.that letter pack arrived today,and i'm digusted,they have told her to put in the letter that she is a dinner lady,and she lives with her partner that is very kind to her,all lies!no likeness at all,my friend is disabled and gets disability benifit,she isnt serverly disabled,but not fit for work,and she doesnt have a boyfriend,never lone a live in partner,i'm so angry.is their 1000's of kids all over england getting letters from birth parents,packed with lies,how are these kids going to feel if they ever meet them,and relise its all been a pack of lies.they have to gain trust in these birth parents to hopefuly have a good relationship.all based on lies.no!! this is wrong.and some thing needs to be done to stop this system of lies lies lies.its not fare on the kids or the birth parents.