Hi everyone,

Long story short, its about 3years since my ex broke off our engagement for someone else. We have a son together (never married)

Since then, she has been in 5 relationships and engaged twice in a period of 12 months, weeks in between the date of split and her second engagement. After our split both was forced to move back to our parents home. I only started dating again 7 months after our split and is still in that same relationship very happy thank you.

The reason i am here today is, my ex has all these men she is introducing to our son. They dont last and the last two engagements the guys weren't bad.. she planned on moving away 350km away after the marriage and when that relationship went down the next guy was visiting two weeks after .. they got engaged a few weeks after that and now she is again back at her parents house with our son because of whatever reason she can think off.

Now only a month after that split there is a new guy visiting her and our son and I am so worried to what this must be doing to our son. Me and him has the best dad/son relationship in the world.. He is now 4years old and i can only imagine how confusing this must be for him. Our son is so friendly and a fun child to be around, he loves the attention and do get along with these men (probably all the gifts - to get to MOM) but in the long run what is this going to teach my son about life and being a man.. what message is she giving our son ??

Is there anything that I can do ?

I am divorced and can't be with another one as they all remind me of my ex. Divorced ones whether at fault or not seem to be made with the same mould. They hop along looking for the next inline. ... they leave and first thing they do is look for the next sucker to take care of her ... hopefully men will soon wake and regard such women as in the same league as they exes. What I am ashamed off is those men who give symphaty and any credit just for pomp.

Hi Ben,

been in your situation still in it fighting for permanent custody.

There were drugs and alcohol involved so I managed to get a lot of evidence and got an urgent application approved by the high court for urgent temp custody, I still have it 7 months later and still busy with the custody case.

You can start by going to the office of the family advocate for advice and take it from there.

Keep your side clean, be good, dont drink, smoke, drug or anything. Be a saint from this day forward if you are not one already. Communicate with her by email only, keep all records. Be nice, be the best person at all times, no matter what they say or do to you.

Be patient, be strong. If you are not close to God, this would be a good time to start. Read Psalms, it will help you. I could not have got where I am in this matter without my Faith. You have nothing to lose.

Start getting your home ready for your son if it isnt already (room and all that), start paving the way for this to happen and it will. if you dont see him often, see him as often as you can without fail, keep all transactions you do at shops for him. I hope you are paying her maintenance, do this via the internet and NEVER stop doing this! File these transactions.

Be the better person at all times, dont lose your cool. She is on the way downhill, let it happen and be ready to act when things explode, and they will. Start gathering evidence. Its not an overnight process, it can take YEARS but you have to start somewhere.

Find God and take the rest of my advice. be strong, I know how hard and sore it is to feel the way you do, use this all to make you stronger. It can be hard to stay positive but keep on keeping on. Get to the office of the family advocate ASAP, take charge.

You are not alone, may God bless you for the battle to come. Make sure you are ready my brother. YOU WILL SUCCEED!!