I am a stepmom to a 12 year old girl. I love her very much and will do anything for her. I know that she is not a little angel and that she is testing us daily, but we work through it.

When she was in Gr 2 we decided to take her with us permanently and then she only visits her mom every Wednesday and second weekend.

She is on boyfriend no 8. She is doing things behind our back. Sending sms's and then deleting the ones that she don't want us to see. My husband said yes that she can start using mxit about a week ago. When we ask her why she is on mxit the whole time when she was with her mom the weekend, she said that she logged off, but not correct. (But her status changed every hour or so). So we know that she is lying to us.

Earlier this month she was not invited to a birthday party. She sms'd one of her friends and told her that she tried cutting her wrists. The mom called us and told us about it. It was only little scrapes and not near her wrists. Her mom freaked out and took her to a psychologist. We had no input into the meeting with the psychologist. We agree with the fact that she went to the psychologist but we do not agree that we had no input into anything and the only side was her and her mother's side.

I found make-up powder in her bag. She uses it for school. I emailed her mom about it. Her mom told me that she took it and that she thought that she lost it. We found the make-up with her again. My stepdaugther told my husband that she forgot to give it to her mom. She then sms'd her mom and told her that if her dad ask anything, she must just say that she forgot about it. So, we know that she (with her mom) is lying to us.

She is also lying about other things and we always find out later that she lied. I don't know what to do, and how to stop the lying. She is hurting her dad. We know that her mom is also lying about a lot of things, so her mom is actually letting her believe that it is ok to lie.

What can we do????