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Joined: 8/1/2008(UTC)
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Guest wrote:Its sickening fact that when fathers leave their kids with ex-wives, the long knives come out, and the hatred he has for her is enacted on the children by refusing to pay, or paying too little maintenance to create a harder life for her.
I am a stepfather to 2 children, 11 and 9 years old - and thier father pays R1200 for BOTH of them per month, out of a salary that after tax is between R13-R16k per month. Luckily I am able to make sure that money is'nt an issue for my wife, and our family.
I do have sympathy for mothers who are divorced and fathers who try and screw the system to pay as little as possible.
According to Child Welfare/Child Advocates Office, the basic calculation is this:
Cost of Child * (Non-Custodial Parent Income / Combined Parent Income)
So, if a child costs R5600 per month, and the child is living with the mother and the father earns R12000 after tax and the Mother R6000 per month, then the calculation is:
R5600 * (R12000/R18000) = R5600 * 0.66 = R3733.33 per month
This is because the father earns almost double what the mother earns, and thus contributes more to the childs costs on a pro-rata basis.
Most non-custodial parents will buy expensive cars and rent/buy larger houses to try and show that thier costs exceed their means to pay an adequate amount. This runs both ways and their are many fathers out there who are also under this kind of duress from resentful ex-wives.
The only ones who suffer in the end are the children. I am glad to see that one person has hit the nail on the head. These calculations are completely correct. I am currently going through a divorce and my ex is refusing to pay anything more than R500.00 per month, for my 16month old. Trust me, that's not even enough to put food on her plate each day. What do you mean, how can a child cost R4600.00 per month? Daycare/creche costs around R1500.00 per month, then it's medical aid, which is about R600.00 per month, if you are on a decent one, the roof over her head, for which the ex is also responsible, as it's his child too, clothing, food, diapers, milk, immunisations (yes, they can add up to quite a bit), the ex is also responsible for a small portion of the petrol costs, your telephone account, etc. all of which is considered to be part and parcel of sustaining a basic life for your child. How often don't we end up going to ER with the little ones, as they fall, etc. Yes, you might have a medical aid, but you still have an admin fee of around R200.00 if you go there. And Murphy's Law, they always do something like that out of office hours, where you could go to the GP. Plus, what about saving for the child's future in terms of education, etc. I think it's disgusting for people to question whether you are using this money for your own bills. I will gladly provide my ex with a breakdown of where exactly the money goes. The ex is 50% responsible for this child. They want all the rights in terms of visitation rights, guardianship, etc., but they don't want the responsibility of looking after the child. They always claim poverty. Times are tough, not only for them, but for us too. It does so happen that often women earn a bit more nowadays, but I went through 4 months of unpaid maternity leave, during which time I still supported the 3 of us and the thanks I get, the acknowledgement of his responsibility is R500.00 per month. Come on people - why must we sit back and just say: "be grateful if you get something". It's exactly that attitude that is letting these people get away with paying R350.00 for an 11 year old, for example, or nothing. Why are we so afraid to do anything about this? Question: if you were still married, living in the same house, would he only be paying R350.00 towards his child - NO - so why now?
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